what if every blade of grass was a penis?
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
