GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
