So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize