I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Randomize
