I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
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