Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
