another moral hangover. fuck.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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