where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
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