I must be too annoying 4 u.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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