Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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