these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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