Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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