Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
