he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize