my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
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