Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
