So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
bring money and cleavage
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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