Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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