when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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