Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
