Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
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