he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
You've changed since you got that strap on
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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