Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
