If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
