I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I just want nice things and good sex
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
