so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
