So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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