The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
kristin has been a bad kristin
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
