Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
He did a backflip because drugs
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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