Nicole vs. Life
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
