she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize
