Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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