My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
