You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize