I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
