i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
