Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I'm passing your future prison.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
