i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
