I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize