She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Randomize
