I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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