She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Randomize
