So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
