Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
