she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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