careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
