Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize