erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize