Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
