So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Randomize
