You're my little dorito
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Randomize
