I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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